What did your mother say that made your jaw drop?

“Mum why is my sister such a bitch!”

Do you know what she said mum?

My mother said to me “ Why didn’t you speak to me about this before”

Have you ever had sex with your mother-in-law? If so, how was it and did your wife ever find out?

What! how could you do that?

“Oh come off it mum what would be the point?”

Oh I said, can my wife have them she would give her right arm to see a Wimbledon tennis final?

What’s one positive trait you’ve gained because of BPD?

She said, “Oh no I can’t give you our tickets, if we can’t go, well we don’t go - it is just not done to give away final tickets.”

What do you mean son?

Well son “ I think I might have got you some tickets”

Can you make a fake K-pop group? It can be with any idols.

Well the other day she came into my shop asking for the usual discount and mentioned that she had tickets for the wimbledon Tennis final but couldn’t go.

True - how I loved my mum!

About 30 years back, I was speaking with my mother.

What is your most erotic sex story?

Well I slept with the president of the Lawn tennis Association year ago, I think he may have remembered!!

What on earth has brought this on, said my mother?

So I said to my sister “ You mean to say that that you leave two empty seats rather than give them to your brother” I replied in astonishment. - “Well yes thats how it works in our circle!” responded my sister.

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Well she is so snotty, O.K. she may have married a bit of money, I don’t know but she feels she is above everybody else.